Hello Fairway Friends!
I recently joined a small, military spouse owned business that offers free training, scholarships, and career assistance to job seekers both in and outside of the military. She's a veteran herself who lives overseas with her husband in South Korea and has done all of this from her home office in Busan! (Yes, she's a total bad ass!)
However, recently she and her small company has come under attack by another "service provider" and this man has been harassing her, her volunteers, and her company partners.
She's never experienced this type of bullying (and by another veteran no less) and is unsure how to proceed. This other training partner claims her space is taking away his clients; not sure why that's her problem, but he has made it his mission to make her life hell.
If anyone has any suggestions or can simply provide some #hypewoman support for this veteran and mil spouses, I know it would go a long way. You can find her on LinkedIn, Kasie Valenti and her awesome company is Sigma Forces.
Thanks Fairway!!
Jennifer, DC Fairway
Do you know who the person is who is bullying her? She and I have one mutual connection and if it’s him I can probably intervene somehow.
I recently took a course called Power With Men. It was put on by The Academy: School of Power for Women, and I highly recommend any of their classes.
One of the tools we learned is called SLAI. It is for influencing others.
S= Statement of the problem (this is not necessarily said to the other person - it’s more for you to get the next steps right)
L = Locate (which mean ask direct questions about how they are behaving - something like “It seems like you are feeling threatened by my company’s existence. Is that true?” Once they agree that you have located them correctly, you move to the next step. Keep asking locating questions until they say yes.)
A = Approve (find ANYTHING about their response that you can fully approve of and tell them. For instance, “I completely understand how being in business can be scary when someone new comes along. Our businesses are our livelihood.”
I = Influence (ask or tell them for what you want. For instance, “Would you be open to referring people to each other if they don’t fit our own model” or “I need you to stop harassing me and my employees. It’s our livelihood as well.”
Without the locate and approve, you can’t influence.
Practice with friends first.
Hi Jennifer, I just sent Katie a message. Thank you so much for letting us know.
Hey Jennifer - I reached out to Kasie and we had a great chat on LinkedIn. Thank you for sharing her story with us - I hope we can help her!
Jennifer, happy to connect her with my lawyer — who specializes in women-owned small businesses — to help her assess her options on next steps. I’ll also be sure to connect with her on LI.